A Message from Noelyne...
What makes you hold onto the past? For what purpose do you dwell on the things that didn't go well and past bad experiences? Are you afraid to let go of the past?
Dwelling on past memories that cause you to feel pain or sad is not a good thing to do. Every moment you spend thinking about the past bad experience you are allowing the pain of the past to live in the present. You are not allowing yourself to let go of past pain. You are choosing to stay stuck in the past and not allowing yourself to enjoy the present moment, which in turn means that you are holding yourself back from a fabulous future.
So for what purpose do you do it? What do you fear? How does holding on to the past serve you? In what way does recreating the pain of the past help you now?
Recalling past happy memories or looking at photos that bring happiness and joy is fantastic. It's important to have a treasure chest full of wonderful happy memories and experiences to recall when the going gets tough. For those low moments when things aren't going so well and the world gets you down. When you don't have happy memories it's not easy to be happy. You can end up living a very serious, unhappy or miserable life where you focus on things that are wrong or missing. Life becomes an uphill struggle and you forget how to laugh.
Life events can cause you to get into a negative state and become miserable without realising it. If you are lucky something happens to make you aware that you are not the bundle of joy you once were. For example, if someone asked you to recall a happy memory would you find thsi easy or would you struggle? If you struggle then it's time to start doing more activities that make you feel happy. You need to build up your reserves, make some deposits into the happy bank.
So for what purpose do you decide not to let go of the past? What do you fear? How does holding on to the past pain serve you? In what way does recreating the memories and pain of the past help you now?
Your experiences make you who you are. The mistakes you make are wonderful opportunities to learn and grow. Be thankful for those opportunities. Learn from them and let them go. You are unable to go back and change the past however the past does not have to equal the future.
Decide how you want to be, do and have and start to focus on what you want rather than what went wrong in the past. Remember that you get what you focus on.
Request a copy of my Free Special Report for more tips on creating a better future by overcoming your fears. In this case a fear of letting go of the past.
Enjoy the process of life,
Noelyne Jones
P.S. Click here for a copy of the Free Special Report
4 comments:
Hmmmmm..... what about the process of grieving then? It is fundamentally important to ones mental health to be able to do that properly however if one is supposed not to have a "bad" thought and let go of the pain pdq - then grieving isn't done properly and negative emotions become stuck in ones mind.
I totally agree that you need to take time to feel the pain of the loss of a loved one. You need to allow yourself time to heal from the loss and to remember all the wonderful times together. And yes if you don't do that properly, if you try to move on too quickly it can have a negative impact on you and you can become stuck.
Thank you,
Noelyne
It's true that people need to let go after an excessive amount of time. Thank you for posting this. You reminded me of a wise man I met a few years ago who, after hearing me complain, gave me a folded sheet of paper. It said to do something or get off the pot. :-) Sometimes I wish I still had that scrap of paper.
Thank you Lionel. And you do still have that piece of paper in your memory, where it can not be removed unless you choose to forget it. It's good to recall positive experiences like the one you had with the wise man. It's part of your personal toolkit. Thank you for posting here.
Noelyne
Post a Comment