Do you ever ask for feedback?

A Message from Noelyne Jones......

I don't know about you however, I used to hate giving and receiving feedback it took me right out of my comfort zone.  I had a real fear of giving and receiving feedback mainly because of how it made me feel.  Now 10 years later I totally get the concept and have benefited immensely from some very effective constructive feedback from friends, colleagues and of course family, (although feedback from family this can sometimes hurt the most)


When we are learning about feedback the emphasis tends to be on the skill of giving feedback and not much emphasis on how we receive feedback.

So what do we mean by feedback?
Feedback is information about how our behaviour affects others. It helps us to see ourselves as others see us.
There's 3 key areas to feedback:

• Awareness: we are told what we have done and what effect it has had. If we are not told the effect it is not feedback!

• Affirming: the affect we are having is helpful or positive and therefore the person who is giving us the feedback wants us to keep doing what we are doing.

• Developmental: the affect we are having is negative and therefore the person who is giving the feedback wants us to consider changing our behaviour.

I’d like you to reflect on occasions you have received feedback.  What happened?  How did you feel?  Was it helpful?  Did you do anything differently as a result?  It is your choice, you don't have to make any changes.  You can just say thank you and walk away.

Receiving personal feedback is possibly the best way of getting to know how we are affecting others. However, we sometimes hear the feedback as a personal attack. We then can become defensive and our defensiveness may mean we get angry, or upset and then we stop listening to what is being said. And then of course if we stop listening, we stop learning.   The trick is to keep our emotions under control, stay Adult.  If you are not sure what I mean you may want to join my Membership site to find out more information on controlling emotions.

So if you've not received any feedback lately then perhaps it's time to ask for some.  Choose someone you trust and who knows you well.  It can be quite enlightening to get someone else perception of you.

Enjoy the process!
Noelyne Jones

P.S. To overcome a Fear of Feedback get my Free Special Report here